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Wednesday, June 01, 2005

Open Letters

Dear Sarah Vowell,

Will you go out with me? I know that there's a 13-year age difference and your ideal man probably completed his college degree, but I think we could work. I mean, I like Public Radio a lot, and Lincoln's my favorite president too! We could talk about the Incredibles or the McKinley administration and get milkshakes! Just check one and get back to me:

DO YOU LIKE ME? __ Yes ___ No

xoxo
Chris




Dear Rob Liefeld,

Hey! Last time I was over at your place, I think I dropped a ring or small object of similar value into your garbage disposal. Or possibly between the spinning blades of a lawnmower. So if you could just reach in there with whichever hand it is you draw with, that'd be swell.

Your buddy,
Chris




Dear Comics,

Apparently you didn't get the memo. I hate to be the one to break this to you, but just giving someone a katana doesn't make them cool anymore. Yeah, I know, but ever since the second Matrix movie I've been having to have this discussion over and over again, and I'd appreciate it if you just didn't let Jimmy write anymore.

Regards,
Chris

7 Comments:

Blogger Mon-El said...

VERY clever, I'm terribly jealous I didn't come up with this one. So I'll just have to do what my God given Italian blood tells me to do...

Steal it.

:)

6/01/2005 11:29 PM

 
Blogger Chris Sims said...

Perhaps you haven't met my ISB Content Enforcement Associate, Vinnie Three-Fingers...

6/01/2005 11:58 PM

 
Blogger Mon-El said...

He's my uncle.

6/02/2005 12:22 AM

 
Blogger autryman said...

I hope the letter to Sarah means that you've given up your John Cassady infatuation.

6/03/2005 2:01 AM

 
Blogger Chris Sims said...

When I originally thought of this post, there was going to be another one that said:

"Dear John Cassaday,

If this whole thing with Sarah Vowell doesn't work out..."

But I figured I could count on Mike Autry to make the joke.

6/03/2005 4:04 AM

 
Blogger lazy_cg said...

reminds me of when they gave nightcrawler katanas in x men legends 2.
He's already cool, or did you not see the opening scene of the second xmen movie.

1/11/2008 12:17 AM

 
Anonymous Clyde said...

Of course, the writer is totally fair.
gender prediction test | good mood | repurposed furniture

11/22/2011 9:27 AM

 

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