Shameless Thievery

Kevin is out of town on business (read: hookers and blow), and hasn't updated his weblog in a couple of days. And since it's currently 11:59 Sunday Night, I think that means that we're going to be denied my favorite weekly feature of his, Genius Covers Sunday.

It would be an internet catastrophe if that was allowed to happen. Therefore, in hopes that Kevin won't mind, I've decided to shamelessly steal that idea for tonight's ISB:

Genius Covers Sunday: Shattering the Fourth Wall

One of the most famous covers inspired by editor Julie Schwartz, and for good reason. If you were a kid in the sixties, how could you NOT buy this issue? If you didn't, the Flash was going to die and never come back ever again and it was your fault. That's marketing genius.

Well, that's just peachy. This would be why I've got people calling up every day wanting me to pay $30 and up for your death. Thanks a lot, Superman. Thanks for ruining everything.

Between the crown, the purple mask, and the fact that he's demanding a billion dollars, thus proving that he is not fucking around, the Monarch of Menace may be my new favorite comic book character.

If a man in a parka and glasses like that offers to show you uncensored Flash pictures, do not give him fifteen cents. He is not a real captain.

You know, this sort of thing seems to happen a lot to the Flash. But when you routinely deal with Super-Gorillas and a world gone green...

I've spoken before at great length about my love for Sgt. Rock covers, so I'll just say this: This is a hell of a lot better than that Army of One bullshit.

"Yeah, I may just be a comic book character, but I'm still the Goddamn Batman, and nobody is going anywhere!"

And that's that. Tell you what, Kevin, just to make it up to you, you can talk about the Karate Kid constantly for the next month, and we'll just call it even. Now let's go see what Campbell's up to for tomorrow's post...