Battlefield Action in the Mighty ISB Manner!

Longtime ISB readers will no doubt be familiar with my deep and abiding love of Sgt. Rock, but while I was surfing Wikipedia today in an effort to find out exactly how Blackhawk is supposed to work, I found something that makes me love him even more.

To the left, you'll see a Joe Kubert Sgt. Rock cover showing everybody's favorite bare-chested war hero as he's usually depicted, about four seconds away from dropping a serious beatdown on some lousy Ratzis. What's important, though, are those two ammo belts slung over his shoulders that give the Sarge his signature appearance.

Now I'm going to go ahead and assume that the majority of you don't have stacks of Soldier of Fortune laying around, but ever since that run of Punisher Armory, I find this stuff oddly fascinating, so bear with me while I go through it. Rock's usually shown carrying a .45 Thompson submachine gun and a .45 Colt M1911 pistol, but the ammo belts are full of .50 calibre rounds. Even Easy's heavy machine gun, a .30 cal Browning usually packed by Designated Big Lug and puppy enthusisast Bulldozer, wouldn't take that kind of ammo, which renders it pretty useless.

The official reason for the ammo belts is that they're Rock's lucky charms--which is pretty tough in and of itself, considering that most people get their luck from a rabbit's foot and not two hundred massive bullets--but we all know that those ammo belts have a very definite and ridiculously, mind-blowingly awesome purpose:

WHEN A GUN IS NOT AVAILABLE, HE BEATS NAZIS TO DEATH WITH THEM.

That is why Sgt. Rock is the baddest motherfucker in the history of comics, and also why you are now freaking out.