Breaking News: Murderous Cyborg Rampage All Area Boy's Fault
METROPOLIS - In the aftermath of an attack on Metropolis by an army of giant, mobile supercomputers armed with disintegrator beams and terrifying metal claws that resulted in millions of space-dollars of property damage and the death of one-third of a Legionnaire, authorities have discovered that the creator of the deadly robot was none other than Querl Dox, alias Brainiac 5 of the Legion of Super-Heroes.
Reached for comment, Dox had this to say:
Dox seemed visibly angered by questioning, continuing with "I invented the [expletive deleted] Flight Ring, [expletive deleted]. What, exactly, have you ever done?"
Local scientists have attributed the tragedy not to Brainiac 5, but to some kind of hoodoo--or possibly a whammy--placed on the Legion by unknown forces. The Luck Lords of Planet Thaun were unavailable for comment.
[Story courtesey of the Associated Press... OF THE FUTURE!]
posted by Chris Sims at 8/08/2006 11:59:00 PM
9 Comments:
Great art; whose is it? It has a Lichtenstein pop-art vibe, at least so it seems to me.
Besides that, the humour of the Chris Sims is top-notch, as always. Keep up the good work.
8/09/2006 2:20 AM
I bet Brainy's a mean drunk.
Awesome post. You should turn that panel into a motivational poster.
8/09/2006 4:05 AM
How do Etch-a-Sketches work, anyhow? They're brilliant!
And at least they don't go on a murderous rampage destroying half a city and one third of a legionnaire.
I reckon Brainiac-5 is a villain in disguise. He's trying to destroy the Legion from within.
"Oh dear, my new hyper medi-heal ray machine has gone whacko and is shooting out beams of deadly radiation! I wonder how that happened...?"
8/09/2006 4:33 AM
They have Etch-a-Sketches in the future? I thought they'd have something a bit more advanced than that by then. A Magna-Doodle at least.
8/09/2006 6:19 AM
The art in that panel, of course, comes from the inimitable Curt Swan.
And come on, it's the 30th Century. Etch-a-Sketches are retro hip.
8/09/2006 8:57 AM
Am I the only one that read "A whammy of the future destroyed one of triplicate girl's three boobs?"
Yeah, I'm a perv.
8/09/2006 12:35 PM
"File photo." Heheheheh.
8/09/2006 12:49 PM
'Am I the only one that read "A whammy of the future destroyed one of triplicate girl's three boobs?"'
No. It's not just you.
8/09/2006 2:41 PM
I like how Bouncing Boy is holding up a picture of his old, inflated self to indicate what his powers used to be. "I used to be real fat!" Triplicate Girl does the same thing, but curiously enough, she appears to have action figures of herself - in their original packaging, no less.
8/09/2006 11:37 PM
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