Name of the Game

Mom and I went to see the local production of Topdog/Underdog tonight, starring Christopher Harvey and one of the shop's customers, Darion McCloud. It was great, and if you're in the area, I encourage you to go see it either tomorrow or next weekend.

When I got to the theater, I was wandering around looking for the bathroom, and got directions from the director. "The men's room is pretty deceptive. It's all the way down the hall, under the stairs." My response, before I could even think not to say it, was: "Hey, thanks! Deceptive Men's Room would be a great name for a band!"

Sometimes I wonder how I interact with people at all.

I spent the whole afternoon and evening with Mom just cruising from place to place in Columbia. Our first stop was at Target, where I was looking at these oversized reprints with cardstock covers they have of Marvel comics. They're crazy. Same content as trades, but they're built just like giant comics with cardstock covers and they cost five bucks. Anyway, I was flipping through Ultimate X-Men v. 2 when I catch myself humming along to whatever they're playing in the store.

That's when I look up and see the Dresden Dolls. Now don't get me wrong, I like the Dresden Dolls a lot. But when you're standing in the middle of Target, the last thing you expect to see is a "Brechtian Punk Cabaret" made up of a gothy pianist and drummer. And yet, there they were, playing Coin Operated Boy.

Moving on.

Most of the time in the car was spent talking to Mom, since she didn't want to listen to the Wu Tang Clan for some reason. Apparently 54 year-old white English teachers don't protect their neck. Yes, Mom's a teacher, and she has a trait that's common among most teachers I've met in my lifetime: They hate children. Well, not really, but you know what I mean. So whenever she starts in with a story on some horrible thing a student did, I tend to listen with a pretty skeptical ear. So we're on the drive, and she tells me this story:

There's this kid in another classroom--a real troublemaker. Always calls his mom to get out of punishment. Anyway, one day he's stiting in class and he asks the teacher, "Mrs. So-and-so, what did you name your vagina?"

Now, the kid being an asshole aside, that is fucking hilarious.

Mom thought I was crazy for laughing as hard as I did about it. Me, I think she's crazy for getting so offended. If it was me in that situation, I would've just rolled with it and said "It's known by men as the Cavern of Sorrows."

And really, what more is there to say?