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Wednesday, February 07, 2007

Romance Interlude: A Minor Delay

A violent disagreement with Domino's Pizza has left me thoroughly unfit to crack jokes about Lois Lane tonight. So instead, I'm going to save my pulse-pounding exposé of the most diabolical wedding of 'em all for Friday.

However, if you're still craving the two-fisted nuptual knockdowns that I promised, I'll let the entirely logical series of events from Superman's Girlfriend Lois Lane #90 speak for itself.

Wait for it.

Not to keep beating the dead horse here, but man. What a dick.



And they all lived happily ever after. Except for Dahr-Nel, I mean.

Link Time!
If you still desire more Lois-related hilarity, check out Jake "The Snake" Bell's Ye Olde Comick Booke Blogge for all your supermelodramatic needs.


Blogger Jon said...

"Am I getting cracked in the crumpet"
Ahaha, that's brilliant. I had to read that twice to be sure it wasn't dirty.

2/08/2007 3:35 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Tarot: Witch of the Black Rose could run for 50 years and never come close to a panel as filthy as Lois Lane in a nightie daydreaming about being cracked in the crumpet.

2/08/2007 3:53 AM

Blogger Richelle Mead said...

All I could think of when I saw that nightie pic is, "Dear Daily Planet, I never thought this would happen to me..."

2/08/2007 4:50 AM

Blogger Jeff said...

A story that once again proves the eternal plot device of the suspended animation capsule...

if there's more than one of them, invariably one that is used by a secondary character will go horribly, horribly wrong.

2/08/2007 4:53 AM

Blogger SallyP said...

Yes, Lois, I am afraid that you ARE Cracked In The Crumpet! You get onto a motorbike with a TOTAL STRANGER! What the heck is wrong with you? And then want to marry him? Gahhhhhh!

I'm beginning to see why Superman tortures her all the time.

2/08/2007 9:55 AM

Blogger Jeff Rients said...

Check out the photos Lois has on her desk in the first panel. That scoop of hers looks rather saucy, judging by the leftmost snapshot.

2/08/2007 10:34 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Those photos on her desk in the 1st panel look like girlie pin-up shots to me.

Just WHAT the heck "scoop" does Perry have her on THIS time?

The rest of that tale seems like a weird stream-of-consciousness series of unrelated events.

Silver Age DC... if that isn't a gateway drug to heroin, I don't know what is.


2/08/2007 10:37 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...


Jeff just beat me to the smut-punch.

My freakin' word verification was the length of the alphabet.


2/08/2007 10:39 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I think we're all overlooking the real moral to the story:

Never get involved with a guy named Darnell. Even if he spells it "Dahr-Nel."

2/08/2007 11:04 AM

Blogger S Bates said...

It would've been better if his name was Darn-El, and thus related to Kal-El. Perhaps an uncle?

A violent disagreement with Domino's Pizza

Did this involve any kicks to the face? If so, are there any pictures?

2/08/2007 11:50 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

and after lois passed out at her typewriter, charles foster kane walked in and finished typing her scoop for her.

2/08/2007 2:18 PM

Blogger MarkAndrew said...

I want to hear about the violent disagreement with Dominos Pizza.

2/08/2007 5:37 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yeah yeah me too! I had a violent disagreement with Dominos once...I buried parts of it in the dessert, in unmarked and shallow graves. I'm pretty sure the coyotes have gotten to it by now...

2/08/2007 6:08 PM

Blogger Jeff said...

So that's what happened to the Noid

2/08/2007 7:55 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

As someone once told, "NEVER call us again!" by a bewildered, beleagured,be-lost and be-30-damned-minutes-late deliveryman, I support your punching the pizzaboy.
And that fifth "Whaaat?!" panel makes Lois look just like Delta Burke.

2/08/2007 9:17 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I like how Superman saw his fellow Kryptonian dying, but "got out just in time" himself. Like he couldn't have tried to save the guy. He doesn't want Lois, he just doesn't want her to be happy.

2/08/2007 9:56 PM

Blogger zc said...

...Oh wow.

Dahr-Nel should totally show up now that DC is all like "yeah we're sorry we kinda erased the Silver Age--here, have a giant key!"

2/08/2007 10:08 PM

Blogger Chris Sims said...

I'm oddly flattered by the fact that you guys assumed it was an actual fistfight, but the "violent disagreement" was actually between their pizza and my stomach.

I did, however, resolve at New Year's to get in a fight this year, so stay tuned.

2/09/2007 12:37 AM

Blogger Timothy Liebe said...

::I want to hear about the violent disagreement with Dominos Pizza.::

So it's NOT like your Blog pic where The Punisher slugs a polar bear, Chris? SHOOT! I'd pay, oh, at least a buck-fifty to see you in your Punisher garb punching out a Domino's pizza. :D

The more of this stuff you show, the more I realize that Superman really WAS a tool when it came to women! Talk about how a writer's idea of perfection is warped by his own issues - "If I had superpowers, I'd show ALL those girls who'd never go out with me when I was a nerd in high school! Never mind that was fifteen years ago and they've got three kids and their second husband just left them for the Swedish nanny...."

Tim Liebe
Dreaded Spouse-Creature of Tamora Pierce
- and co-writer of Marvel's White Tiger comic - Issue #4 out now! :)

2/09/2007 11:43 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I just saw the Peter Jackson "King Kong" for the first time, and have come to a realization: it's a metaphor for Superman and Lois. Kong is Superman, Naomi Watts is Lois, and all Kong's troubles start when he meets Naomi Watts. Kong's abduction to NYC is metaphor for Lois finally tricking Superman into marriage. And the seemingly endless biplanes and machine gun fire represent putting up with Lois's shit for year after year.

2/09/2007 11:55 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

"... cracked in the crumpet"

I am SO incorporating that into every day casual dialogue!

"Would you like fries with that?"

Me: Are you cracked in the crumpet?


2/11/2007 11:19 PM


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