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Saturday, January 29, 2005

Boston Legal Prequel Party

This edition of the ISB is being broadcast live from a secure location known only as the Secret HQ as we roll on through Boston Legal Prequel Party!

The stage was set for tonight's festivities by the abysmal day we've had around here. I imagine Local News Douchebag is going to have a caniption fit tomorrow night bringing us the news about "CHILLING SUB-FREEZING TEMPERATURES IN THE MIDLANDS."

It was apparently so bad that the shop had to close, which works out for the best since I was so bored I invented a new ultimate martial arts weapon and scared away customers.

That's right. It's a toilet plunger handle connected to a Spider-Man mini-basketball with ten rubber bands. I have christened it the Ultimate Mace of Sadness, and legends say it traps men's souls within its office-supply laden form.

So since work left off early, Scott and I were able to get dinner at a local Chinese place where they McJordaned us up a delicious beef/broccoli/walnut dish while Scott spent no less than two hours bringing me up to speed on the Practice. You, on the other hand, can find out most of this information by checking the aforelinked Official BLPP website. When I told Scott we needed a website for the party, he told me that I have a gift for tricking people into generating content for my blog. "Before the end of the week," he said, "you'll have Tug pushing Chad down the street in a rocket-powered skateboard."

Which brings us up to right now, where there's sadly no breaking of the land speed record. We are currently one episode into the five we have scheduled for tonight, and as I write this, Soul Train is on Scott's TV. Those of you who know Scott and I should find that suitably amusing.

So Alan Shore has just won his suit against Young, Frutt, and Berluti, in an episode that featured no less than four impassioned speeches and two super-hot girls. After Scott described the Practice to me--and brother, that's a bleak world of noble men defending serial rapists--it's awesome to see the buildup come to a head in these episodes. Financially, ideologically, and even in the meta-show where we don't know who's coming back next season, it's literally Boston Legal (with Denny Crane and Alan Shore) versus the Practice (with the rest of 'em) for all the marbles!

If Alan Shore used the Astro-Force to reflect Eugene Young's Omega Beams, it'd be damn near perfect.

So if there's anyone out there joining in with the party with their own Shatner, Spader, or David E. Kelly viewing, raise your glasses in toast. I'm going to get back to the hot legal action.



Blogger Philip Looney said...

I can't believe you took a picture of the mace. But then again, I took a picture of my own hand.

Carry on.

1/31/2005 5:45 PM

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