Rule Number One for Successful Barbarian Living
You are Hrothgar the Strong, mightiest of all Vanirmen. You proved yourself in combat as early as your eleventh summer, taking down a foul dog of the Aesir more than twice your size.
Your weapons are sharp, your sword-arm is strong, and scores of enemies have fallen beneath your deadly blade. You are an unstoppable engine of rage and destruction set against the enemies of your people.
And then you decided to fuck with Conan.
This was not a good decision on your part.
Rule Number One for Successful Barbarian Living: If at all possible, be Conan.