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Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Chris vs. Previews: April 2007, Part Two

With this post, it'll be three months that I've been doing these Previews Round-Ups, and while I've stuck to the tried-and-true format of doing the major publishers one day and the small press companies the next up to this point, I've been seriously considering an adjustment to that little formula.

I mean really--and I say this as someone who owns more shirts from Graphitti Designs than any sane person ought to--I could go on about the apparel section alone for days. Why?

Because this is the third month in a row that they have offered this:

The mind boggles.

But there'll be time enough for that later! For now, there's still half a catalog to get through, and we're burning daylight here!

P.222: Amaze Ink/Slave Labor Graphics: I've mentioned it once or twice, but it really shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone familiar with my sense of humor that I rank Evan Dorkin right up there with Michael Kupperman and Kyle Baker as one of--if not the--funniest creators in comics today. So needless to say, I'm looking forward to Biff! Bam! Pow!, the first new comic that he's put out since October.

Because really, a comic about a crime-fighting Interstellar Boxing Champ named "One-Punch Goldberg" is pretty much exactly what I want to read.

P.265: Dynamite Entertainment: In addition to their first issue of The Boys now that they've acquired it from DC under mysterious (to me, at least) circumstances, this month's output from DE--or as I like to call them, The Last Thing We Need Comics, Inc--includes nine titles with a grand total of thirty covers between them. Admittedly, this is lagging behind Avatar's 7:32 ratio, but considering that they've managed to find something even more tasteless than the Lady Death vs. Pandora bondage cover with their Dead Baby homage to Nevermind, I'm going to have to award this round to Dynamite.

Well-played, DE. Well-played.

P.289: Digital Manga Publishing: Given my previous comments about Manga in last night's post and the fact that you're not reading this on a LiveJournal account, you've probably already deduced that my interest in yaoi is pretty much nil. Even so, if DMP keeps making ads like this...

...then they can make whatever the hell they want, because that is the funniest thing I have ever seen.

P.300: First Second: Long-time ISB readers are probably familiar with the fact that I've developed a pretty cordial relationship with the good people over at First Second based on the fact that they send me their books, I flip out about how awesome they are, and everybody goes home happy. Even if it wasn't for that, though, I'd still be telling you to order Eddie Campbell's The Black Diamond Detective Agency, purely on the basis that his last book from :01, Fate of the Artist, stands alongside American Born Chinese as one of the best graphic novels I've read in the past year, and I can pretty much guarantee that you won't want to miss it.

P.384: Zenescope Entertainment: When the solicitations for Return to Wonderland went up online, I recieved an email from Matt Algren, who claimed that it was my duty as an American to once again lay my own sanity on the line and review a series that includes a splash page that he described this way:

That's a grown up Alice of Alice in Wonderland, who has just attempted suicide in a bubble bath (hawt!!!) and has been found by her daughter, who has apparently dragged her out of the tub and put the bubbles in just the right position so she could be drawn nekked as she lay dying all splayed out on the floor. (2x hawt!!! . . . I guess.)

Well, Matt, as much as I hate to disappoint, I've leafed through an issue of Grimm Fairy Tales, and those things are damn near incomprehensible. Sure, I read Tarot and Anita Blake, and while the things that happen in those books are really, really stupid, there are at least things happening. But with this stuff, aside from poorly presented fetishism for latent pedophiles, there's just not a whole lot there.


P.400: 52: The Novel: ... Seriously?


P.415: Okay, before we go any further, I feel like I should warn you that things are about to get really, really geeky, even by the standards of a comic book blog. Heck, they're about to get geeky even by the standards of a comic book blog that devoted the better part of a week to discussing the majesty that is Volstagg, so for those of you who are already perilously close to nerd overload, I'll meet you down at the T-Shirt section.

Okay, anybody still here? All right, this is just between us here, and it's a question in two parts that I want you to think very carefully before you answer:

1. Who would win in a fight between Number Six and the Daleks?

2. How freakin' awesome would that be?


Ah, the apparel section! There's really no better way to cleanse the palate of one's own forays into the abyss than by mocking products directed at those even worse off than me! Whatcha got for me, T-Shirt Section?!

P.441 Jimmy Olsen T-Shirt:

Ah, crap. Yeah... I'm gonna need that.

Come on, there's got to be something in here I can poke fun at to deflect my own misgivings about hypothetical mid-60s British Sci-Fi matchups!

P.445: Dragon Catcher Double-Sided T-Shirt:

Ah, that's better. Thanks, Previews! I knew you wouldn't let me down!

And that's the catalog. If anything caught your eye this time--or if you have any responses to my estion-quay about Atrick-pay Goohan-McAy--feel free to leave a comment!


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Daleks vs. Prisoner, Daleks win based on the fact that the Prisoner has a terrible record against robots. If Rover can get him, a time traveling cyborg will nail him to the way. And yes, that would be terribly awesome times like, a billion. (Please note I'm more of a Prisoner fan than a Dr. Who fan, so I've really thought this out)

4/04/2007 1:31 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

To the way? I meant wall. Argh!

4/04/2007 1:32 AM

Blogger Bill Reed said...

I dunno if I'd want Jimmy Olsen peeking out of my waist/crotchal area.

4/04/2007 1:33 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I was going to say Number 6 would win, but Paul has a fair point about that whole track record against robots thing.

The fight would be awe inspiring to see, though.

And, as a total aside I always feel the need to make when discussing 60's Doctor Who: Damn the BBC to hell for destroying so many episodes. Damn them all.

4/04/2007 1:56 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Yes,but this has brought to mind an even cooler question-what about Number ^ from Galactica vs. the Daleks?
And despite 6's lousy track record,I think he could beat the Daleks.

4/04/2007 2:24 AM

Blogger LurkerWithout said...

Wait, I'm supposed to be doing stuff on yaoi manga with my journal? Damn, I knew I was violating one of the Rules of Use for LJ...

Pix of cats? Check

Occasional angry yet whiny rants about family? Check

Links to new manga with boys kissing boys? No check

Dammit, they're gonna break my blogging hand...

4/04/2007 2:29 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

The real question; Rover vs. The Daleks.

4/04/2007 3:56 AM

Blogger Jeff said...

Agreed. Number 6 woule be smart enough for the robots without hands to take each other out...or at least keep each other busy enough that he can get out of the Village.

4/04/2007 4:12 AM

Blogger Siskoid said...

That Dalek calender would rock so much more if it were for the year 2150.

Or maybe 2164.

4/04/2007 6:47 AM

Blogger S Bates said...

Well, technically the Daleks aren't robots... but we won't go there.

And if it's Number 6 against all of the Daleks then I'm afraid 6 will be well and truly exterminated.

Still not sure what's funny about the yaoi pic, though.

4/04/2007 8:21 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Go there, Nimbus!

They're not robots, they're mutated little ugly creatures who travel in personal tanks because they can't survive without life support systems.

Anyway, considering that Number 6 is a prisoner, I don't think there's a lot he could do against Daleks with spaceships and lasers and Tom Servo-style hoverskirts. IMO, lame matchup.

Better would be the A-Team vs. Daleks. No, the A-Team has nothing to do with The Prisoner... but I love it when a plan comes together.

4/04/2007 8:55 AM

Blogger Chris Sims said...

Number Six isn't a prisoner.

He's THE Prisoner.

4/04/2007 9:01 AM

Blogger joncormier said...

As much as I like the Jimmy Olsen image as a computer desktop wallpaper, I'm not sure I could condone that T-shirt.

Just imagine yourself wearing it pantless - it gives me the jibblies. Or that's probably one transformation of Jimmy Olsen that was relegated to an artists drafting table after years of slaving away on that title.

4/04/2007 9:19 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

No mention of the Showcase Presents: Legion of Superheroes tpb coming out today?

Shame, shame...

4/04/2007 9:35 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well, I did say they were cyborgs. Anyway, don't get me wrong I love the Prisoner to death, it's just that he got beat up or drugged about every episode. I think the real contest would be... could he ESCAPE from the Daleks and the answer would be Hells Yeah!

4/04/2007 10:17 AM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

"The real question; Rover vs. The Daleks."

Stalemate. Rover can scale stairs, Daleks can't. (Blah, blah, I know. Flying Daleks.) On the other hand, Rover can't actually hurt the Daleks in any way.

What's more interesting is that Doctor Who vs. The Prisoner crossovers are nothing new.

4/04/2007 10:38 AM

Blogger Shon Richards said...

Yes, yes, the Daleks might Number #6, but they will never win in the battle to break his spirit!

4/04/2007 10:46 AM

Blogger Jeff Rients said...

The fact that the Daleks aren't robots is the deciding factor for me. They're people. Sick, twisted, alien people, but people nonetheless. That means, unlike Rover, Number 6 can play minds games with them. Number 6 for the win.

4/04/2007 11:44 AM

Blogger Nate said...

The Tribal Wolf t-shirt better be available in XXXXL or I'm not bothering leaving my mom's basement to buy it.

Even if it comes with a coupon for pizza.

4/04/2007 12:33 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sadly, while I haven't seen the PRISONER in WELL over a decade (*sigh* need to buy the DVD's),
I haven't actively watched Dr. Who since the TOM BAKER years, although I did watch the U.S. made for TV movie several years back (with Paul McGann) and just caught the first 2 episodes of the (Christopher Eccleston) WHO the other night (and LOVED it!).

However, this post is just to toss out there a little clip from the 1st Doctor.


A clip from the 1965 episode 'The Chase' where the Doctor, Ian, Barbara and Vicki watch the Beatles play 'Ticket to Ride' on the Time/Space Visualiser.



4/04/2007 1:43 PM

Blogger Unknown said...

James - I think you mean "Little green blobs in bonded polycarbide armour."

There's no way anyone save the Doctor can stand up to the Daleks. Baddest MFers in the multiverse.

4/04/2007 1:50 PM

Blogger Jeff said...

But what if The Prisoner were able to take the Daleks on in a game of Kosho? Then I think Number 6 would have the advantage.

4/04/2007 2:04 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

>> Better would be the A-Team vs. Daleks. No, the A-Team has nothing to do with The Prisoner... but I love it when a plan comes together. <<

Holy shit, I really want to see the A-Team fighting the Daleks! B.A. could throw one Ogron through a door and then another out a window...Hannibal could disguise himself as Davros...and then at the finale the Daleks could lock them in a garage with a Plymouth Barracuda, a welding kit and three tons of armor plate and they could turn it into a makeshift tank! I know its a copyright violation, I know it would give continuity geeks impotence, but dammit, that is what comic books are for!

4/04/2007 2:08 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

What's really funny is that "Friends with Benefits?" looks for all the world as though it is drawn by John Romita Jr. trying out a manga style.

4/04/2007 2:55 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sorry, but no. NO!

Jimmy Olsen sneakly coming out of your pants to see if the world is ok and good is NOT OK.

4/04/2007 3:39 PM

Blogger Phil Looney said...


(I vote MacGoohan whenever possible, even in instances where it does not call for it.)

4/04/2007 4:20 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Somewhere out there on this big ol' internet of ours, someone is now writing a Prisoner/Dr Who crossover fanfic where the Daleks attempt to invade the Village and only John Pertwee and Patrick McGoohan can stop them. It is unlikely to be as awesome as it sounds.

4/04/2007 5:19 PM

Blogger Adam said...

Number 6, easy. He's got a flexibility of intellect that the narrowly focused daleks lack. He'd find a way, just like the Doctor does every time.

He'd even trick them into killing the current Number 2.

Pertwee/McGoohan? Pah. Baker/McGoohan every time. In a classic misunderstanding-then-fight-then-team-up kind of way.

"Would you like a jelly-baby?"

"Ah-no thankyou. Tell me, who sent you?"

"Nobody sent me. Are you sure? The red ones are very nice."

"Too much sugar. Be seeing you."

4/04/2007 6:55 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I agree with the previous opinions regarding the Olsen T-Shirt.
I'm just wondering, would a shirt rendering of the Darkseid ad have the same effect?

4/04/2007 8:10 PM

Blogger Chris Sims said...

No mention of the Showcase Presents: Legion of Superheroes tpb coming out today?

Shame, shame...

I'm not sure if you quite understand what's going on in this post, sunshine.

4/04/2007 8:55 PM

Blogger Chris Sims said...

jon cormier said...
Just imagine yourself wearing it pantless

Don't mind if I do!

justin said...
What's really funny is that "Friends with Benefits?" looks for all the world as though it is drawn by John Romita Jr. trying out a manga style.

You know, you're right.

I also feel like I should point out that "FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS?" isn't the name of the book in question, it's just DMP's usual crazy-ass ad copy, and the fact that it's huge text with a giant question mark just cracks me up.

4/04/2007 10:58 PM

Blogger Mike Haseloff said...

Does the Olsen shirt come in orange? That's great!

4/05/2007 12:00 AM

Blogger Rob S. said...

If Jimmy Olsen peeps out of your pants and sees Eclipso, there'll be six more weeks of Countdown.

4/05/2007 7:41 PM

Blogger Chris Sims said...

I still fail to see what would be wrong with going around looking like I had Jimmy Olsen... in my pants.

4/05/2007 11:04 PM

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Okay, now compare the Olsen T-Shirt to this.

Even the font is the same.

4/11/2007 3:36 PM


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